Why Accomplishments Do Not Define Your Importance
The trophies (or lack of) are irrelevant
Being at the top is very tempting. You get praise, rewards, recognition, and all the greatness that comes with it.
I felt on top when my nightclub was #1 in the city. The validation felt great, and I don’t want to downplay that at all.
But what you quickly realize is that none of this defines your importance.
Unfortunately, unless we are at the top, it is easy to feel as if things are going wrong. As if we are not as important as we could (or should) be.
What defines your importance?
First things first, if winning or being on the top is not what defines your importance… what does?
Are you a good person?
How do you think of yourself?
What is the quality of your relationships?
What kind of impact do you have on the people around you, your community, or the world?
At the end of the day, your importance comes from the things you value most. Defining your values will help determine what makes you feel important.
If you value your friends and family, then nurturing your relationships will help raise your importance.
If you value kindness or health, then respecting others and working out will make you feel important.
Regardless, you do not need to be the best at any of those things in order to have importance.
Being the best is not a sustainable value because only one person can be up there. On top of that, it’s temporary.
The common misconception
Many people are super competitive (myself included). Part of that is because of the world we grew up in, and another part is really just based on survival.
Being competitive has its benefits. But you won’t always win.
Previously, I wrote about the value of being in the middle. You can be happy there regardless.
But aside from happiness, being on top still won’t define how important you are.
You don’t need to be the CEO of a company to have a massive impact on those around you.
You don’t need to be the best player in the NBA to inspire others to play.
You don’t need to be the smartest person alive to innovate greatness that benefits the lives of many people.
Who are you really?
The harsh truth is that most of the time, people don’t feel important, not because of the fact that they aren’t at the top, but because of how they view themselves.
If every time you look in the mirror, you are disappointed… then you will not feel important.
This is often the result of comparing yourself to others.
You just need to shift your perspective.
Stop comparing yourself to others and instead, compare yourself to who you were yesterday.
Are you lifting more at the gym?
Did you positively affect someone else’s life?
Did your business earn another happy customer?
It really comes down to the metrics by which you are measuring yourself.
While challenging yourself is important, realistic measures of progress are too.
Love yourself
Constant self-reflection will be needed in order to realize that you are not only constantly improving, but that you deserve all the love in the world.
You will continue to grow, you will love yourself even more, and you will be encouraged to be better (which will make you feel more important anyway).
Change your metrics, change how you view yourself, and double down on what you stand for.
If you do that, the accomplishments that you once strived for will no longer matter.
Thanks for reading